If you suffer from low self esteem
you may have a victim mentality. Have you heard of this term before?
If you have this mentality you view yourself as a victim and in pain.
Some people are right to think this because they have suffered at the
hands of others or life has dealt them a blow but even if you have a
reason you don't have to feel like a victim and pity yourself you can rise
above events and refuse to submit to them.
Have you ever asked
yourself " why does this always happen to me?". Some people go through
life asking questions like this and wonder why all these bad things do
keep happening to them. Perhaps being more
positive would help but we'll come to that a bit
later.
What causes you to have a Victim
Mentality?
There are several causes:
- Bad things that happen to you and your reaction
-
What you tell yourself ( your negative self
talk)
- What others tell you
- Negative thinking
- Your belief in fate or personal responsibility
- Your religious beliefs
Lets take a quick look at these causes. Firstly, bad things happen to
everyone, that's just how life is. Some people act as though each setback
is a major drama and create stress and pain for themselves. Why? Many
reasons, you feel important when you convince yourself
that you have huge problems. It satisfies the ego.
What you
tell yourself is obviously going to affect your mood, behaviour and happiness so negative self
talk is likely to help cause or prolong a victim mentality. If you are
negative you cannot see reality and therefore your decisions will be based
on wrong assumptions. More bad decisions lead to more more pain and
failure which will encourage you to believe that you are indeed a
victim.
Negative comments from others can cause you to become very
negative and it is very easy to misinterpret what others tell you. A
negative comment or offensive behaviour towards you may say a lot about
the other person. Maybe they have a big problem and that's why they are
treating you badly. If you have a negative mentality you will just take
what they say or do at face value and believe that you are again a victim.
Do you believe in fate or do you think
you are responsible for your life and what happens to you? The victim
feels that he or she has been treated unfairly but is trapped. There seems
to be no way out. In extreme cases the victim may even start to believe
that he or she is being punished and deserves to be a
victim.
Religious beliefs, can like everything else, have a
positive or negative affect on your life. If you believe in a God who is
responsible for everything and who punishes you if you do something wrong
it is easy for you to believe there is a reason for your pain and misery.
What are the effects of a victim
mentality?
When you see yourself as a victim you feel life hasn't treated you
fairly. You may be angry as a result blaming everybody for your
misfortune. You may feel you are being punished or even deserve to be a
victim. Your self esteem will be very low. You will suffer from negative
thinking and might feel trapped.
What can you do
about it?
- Check out my e-book "Self Esteem Secrets"
and start building your self esteem and confidence
- Stop being angry or feeling helpless and understand that you are
responsible for your own life. Decide to do something about it and get
help if you need it
- Question your negative thoughts, don't believe them automatically
- Do whatever you can to be positive
- Stop being a victim and stand up for yourself -
find out how this
self hypnosis program
can help you.
You don't have to be a victim, truly the only one who makes you feel
like one is the same person who can free you ---- you!
next article
- self acceptance
®
